Today, I will review my pet dog.
My pet dog is not like your average pet dog. In fact, he is unlike any other dog I have ever met before in my life. He is kind, quiet, relaxed, and loves to play dog games. He is very handsome (see picture above). He has a gorgeous, flowing mane, akin to a big, beautiful, majestic lion's.
He loves to play outside, especially when it's raining. He then loves to come inside after playing in the rain to track mud all over the house. He then loves to get savagely beaten by my father for getting mud all over the carpet. Seriously, he likes it a lot. Don't worry.
My pet dog responds to the name, "Dog". He chose the name for himself. He's a really smart pet dog.
Dog is 49 years old. In dog years. That equates to about 50 human years. Right? Yeah.
My pet dog is also not real.